Skipping the other days, I shall blog an entry on yesterday! HEEHEES.
Gosh. I so regret I never join Nee Ann Poly. Cos there's quite a few handsome and cute guy? At least better than some in JC. Bleahs. So mesmerise. Heehees.
Anyway, I went to NP for Jingting's performance call Arts 21. Neh neh. She really come out for 2 minute sia. Waste my 6 bucks. Lols. But nevertheless, JINGTING YOUR ACTING IS GREAT!!! 唉哟!很凶哦! Hahas.
The whole performance includes choir, dance, chinese orchestra, harmonica, a capella, and of course Jing's stage arts was about 2 hours.
Well, it's not a bad show but the emces were a little out lar. They didn't know how to get enagage with the audiences, or I should say that they didn't rehearse well?
However, the performances was not bad. Am quite amazed by the impact of the orchestra because there's so little people yet so loud. And because of cello guy. Hahas. Harmonica also very ear pleasanting. HEEHEES.
Went to eat zi cha after the performance at Clementi with Yijia, Yunlu and Andrea. The dishes was not bad and 1 person only round 7 bucks. So yar, not that expensive.
HERE COMES THE PICTURES:
Arts 21. Well, I didn't hand in the feedback form but to let Jingting know, I don't think there's any decoration in whole lecture theatre except this signboard. :)
Andrea and I :D (got double-chin! ARGH!)
From back: Yunlu's smelly guy (LOLS!), YunLu, Yijia, Andrea and Me (big face! ARGH)!
We caught this boy boy burying his head into the his mango fruit cake to eat it! SO CUTE!!
HERE COMES THE HIGHLIGHTS OF THE NIGHT!!!
The harmonica guy! He's so kawaii!!
His name is Elson and he is the chairperson in the organising committee of this whole show! OMG. However, his taken. SAD. That lady beside her, is his girlfriend. Boo. But nevermind, she forgiven because she is pretty!
More of them.
HERE IS MY FAVOURITE OF THE NIGHT!
THE CELLO GUY!! Jing said that he is a Taiwanese! OMG. GREAT.
Like what I've said before, Taiwan always produce "branded" quality guys, unlike Singapore. Bleahs.
He's really cute! When he came out for the start of the whole show, for chinese orchestra, my eyes have already landed on him! WAHA!
DOUBLE COMBO! CELLO + HARMONICA GUY! (blur)
Jia, your favourites! LOLS.
Jing's out! She's is the very fierce sell bun aunty!
So fierce and unfriendly and heartless, people no money buy bun then hungry also don't want give. BLEAHS. HAHAS.
See! This aunty action so big!
Alamak! So unfriendly! Still push people away!
After everything they crazy together! LOLS.
Actually he wants to give the flowers to me lor! LOLS. (Fat hope!)
A picture with the sell bao aunty!
LOLS. That's all!
Anyway, I'm leaving for China tomorrow! It's a 10 days trip! Sad. Hais. Can't see friends and family for 10 whole days! Unbelieveable! Lastly,
I'll BE BACK SOON!Hees.
On Sunday, returned back from Bangkok trip! Just a very short 2 days 2 night trip and got myself really exhausted due to the shoppings and walking around. But, it's still very satisfying because the stuffs there are f***ing cheap!
Have to use the word because all those products we get a Far East Plaza or any push cart on our way in Singapore are only selling like half the price there!? So bloody cheap and felt so cheated! Some of them are even 1/3 of the SGD price. Gosh. Unbelieveable right? Go there and you will know what I mean.
However, Bangkok is not a place for everyone. It's more suitable for those who are skinny or average size because most of the thai people have rather good figures. Therefore, not surprisingly, I didn't get mysel f any tops because I simply can't fit into any. And the largest shoe size there for female is actually only 39. Hardly you can see 40.
Well, thankfully I got myself 2 bottoms so not that bad. If not I'll never want to go there again. LOLS.
Alright. Pictures time!
Pls believe that we brought this along for shopping. xD
A whole box of goodies! But not for me. My sis bought them for her colleagues and friends.
Shagged me. Hantu sis behind. LOLS!
Goodies for you all! Eh. Don't say I kiam siap only give you all a few packets ok. 1/4 of the food are mine only lor.
Bangkok Airport!
HERE COMES THE HAO LIAN-ING TIME! HEEHEES.
Most mine and some given away!
Alright. It's late. Will be back tomorrow with NP hot guys' pictures! WAHAHA!
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Tuesday, November 21, 2006
My life has never been filled with so much hurdles before.
I've never experienced a time where I have no idea what is my own decision.
I've never experienced a time where I'm so totally defeated.
I've never experienced a time where I don't know how to pull myself back and stay strong again.
I've never experienced such low and torturous feeling before.
If trying and trying again does help, I won't mind.
But I've been trying so hard already.
I swear I wasn't so hardworking before.
But, in the end, I'm still given such treatment.
Yar, probably I'm just stupid.
I'm not those who take studying as their daily life as if their food.
I just can't.
I'm just feeling so lost. I just need someone to talk to.
Someone who won't feel disappointed in me.
Someone who will give me an answer for my questions.
To leave or to stay? I don't know.
Maybe leaving this world is a way out?
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Thursday, November 16, 2006
The Math I'm learning now are just some funny figures put together and I've got to solve them using their illogical methods and formuale.
What is it gotta do with daily life? Other than calculating money, and probably the probability of winning Toto, what can it help in future? I can't calculate how much salt I must put in my food to make it tastier.
So does drawing a graph, knowing how to solve y=x+1 applicable in life?
Ya, and all those binomial expansions, indices, graphing techniques, what does it got to do with my life?
They are just here to drive me crazy and nothing else.
I hope tomorrow is the end of everything, hopefully for this year. Erm, badfully for the rest of my life.
Seriously, I just feel that they are so inapplicable in my life and it's such a nonsense to be crazy studying over it and still, i can't find the logic behind all these theories.
I really hope to study accounts. Though I heard lots of comments saying that it's another thing that drives people crazy. But at least it's something useful to find a living, a job, in future.
You can't go tell your boss that "Oh! I'm very good in Math. Especially Amaths, I can draw a function graph without a graphic calculator!"
Ya right, who cares, which job need you to draw a function graph. Go be a Math teacher then. That's the only way out.
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Sunday, November 12, 2006
On Friday, I just came to realise that I'm actually someone who hated night life.
Those that youngsters out there think that is perfect chilling and relaxing is quite annoying to me.
Am I old?
I just hated the feeling when your surrounding is filled with haze and ya, supposedly to be friendly people. Am I anti-social or what? I just can't stand them.
Luckily I'm not like in a pub, disco or something? I might as well kill myself if I'm there.
Seriously, probably I'm just a homely person.
All I can do, to my limits, and of course that makes me wanna stay out late is with my own friends. Friends that I have ample of topics to coffee talk with; friends that I can talk stories from Jurong to Changi and from Changi back to Jurong.
Ya, probably I shouldn't try any clubbing or what when I'm officially 18? I'll die of boredom in there.
I found the world of difference between you and me that night.
You wanted to stay out late so much.
I wanted to go home and get away from that hazy and stinky place so much.
Maybe, I should think again. Have time changed the bond of our friendship?
Maybe to you, those who can do all the chillings with you are your real friends. I'm just a nag to be beside you, telling not to do this and that. And ya, ok, alright, the one to be rigid minded.
I'll not change my thinkings, cos I admit and certainly think that I'm a very rigid and stubborn person, you want to do all those things, don't find me next time, or just stay away from me while doing so.
But I'll never avoid being the one listening to you. =)
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Thursday, November 09, 2006
Thanks for all the encouragement. Especially from my 2 very beloved sisters. I'll do my best. And I agree with Ying that not all leaders are able to lead themselves. I'm certainly one of them. =)
However, I've really decided to do my best now. Especially after Miss Siew Shuhui, in almost every sms tell me to jia you and fight Math with her. But girl, your math so easy, you come and fight my one lar! LOLS. Just joking.
Ya. Envy you. Tomorrow you can have your freedom once again, while I have to study for like 1 more week? Omg. *Faints* And tomorrow still have to party with you and ying with agony! BLEAHS! Nevermind.
Make sure you two don't come and disturb me next week hor. Go find your Dominic.
Heard you two having candle-lit dinner with him on tuesday! LOLS. Don't rape him hor. LOLS. Remember he's not straight.
Alright. Real official studying shall start on Saturday. For the sake of happy holidays and then I can go rent all those nice nice taiwanese drama series to watch le! I want rent, NAN DING GE ER, E ZUO JU ZHI WEN, WEI XIAO PASTA, ZHUANG QIU XIAO ZI and lots lots more.
Just saw TS selling nan ding ge er dvd at $15. So tempting. OMG. Heehees. COS GOT KUNDA. *faints* Tian kong mei you xia yu, wo xiang hai lai de ji... (Bet hui must be laughing now. Cos I went to her house and repeat this songs like ample times. LOLS.)
Ok. Tomorrow need to go back and hand in I&R. Wa biangs. After that still got mass dance practice for the Xi'an trip. What the hell. Go there pay money still must dance for them to see. Think I very free ar? Sians.
And ya! I won't have a boring christmas! Cos I'm having a BBQ. YEAH. Happy. Got some uterior motive. Only Jieying know. Shhh... Heehees..
Ok. Stop for today.
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Wednesday, November 08, 2006
I gonna write this even if my sisters or anybody is in this world are going to see them.
Sometimes, someday, some moment, somehow, I wish I could make myself study too.
I wish I could be motivated to do so.
I wish I need not sit there and stone and don't understand a single thing inside.
Most importantly, I wish I could be motivated. I know. Self-motivation is the most important way. Cos other might not know how to motivate you. But the problem is now that I can't be self-motivate myself. I actually don't wish to.
Every morning, waking up, knowing that you are going to go to a place that you loathes, be taught by teachers (ya, not all) that don't even know they are teaching or singing songs to themselves, making friends that actually are of wide different world from you and you have to accommodate them because you're the extraordinary, participating in things that you are not even interested of.
Probably you might feel that they are just very superficial stuffs. They are some things that I can ignore and carry on with life of just myself. But how could I ignore when all these scenarios are taking place almost everyday? At least 90% of my 2006?
Nobody knows. Nobody knows my difficulty in having to smile and act like a joker idiot in school and back home I still have to act as if nothing has happened. Sometimes, I just think that I might suffer from depression soon. Sometimes, I just wish some funny disease strikes me and I die off quickly. 我已经快要窒息了!
But, I'll still like to thank my buddies especially, Jieying, Shuhui and Jingting. Almost every week, when they initiate to talk to me, I'll pour them with my surrows and probably they've heard them like zillions times. This is the only way I can share part of my unhappiness with my friends.
Apart from people and studies, another strong point of me not being motivated is because of the subjects. I know Math is possible to be done, Phyiscs need understanding and practices. But what about Chinese Lit? I'm never able to memorise things. Words, phrases just goes in to me and come out in another. I'm quite disturb by that too. Sometimes even what people said I would also face difficulties remembering.
And seriously, I'm not quite confident of my phyiscs though it appear to be better than taking chemistry. Even teachers tell us that physics is quite a guy stuff.
Ying's sis and Hui's sis both fell on this subject. One got an E and one dropped. And to actually think that Hui's sis got As and Bs for her A level and she dropped, is physics that sucky?
I probably can't see anywhere as my future now. Alright. To admit I might not be able to see any future if I go poly now.
It's actually quite funny. A strong and motivated girl, once a chairperson of her cca, could not lead herself.
How I wish I was back then in secondary school. Where all my happiness lies.
现在，我只能戴着面具过着一直在迁就我周遭环境的生活。说真的，我真的累了。从一开始就选择的错的方向，是我自己一时的异想天开。自认为或许这是领导我走向我美好未来的一条道路，把我弄得如此的不快乐。很久很久我都没有好好的发自内心的笑了。
或许向姐说的一样，如果我选择换个道路走，我会感到空虚。但是我在这儿也已经空虚到了极点。但我也不知道将来如果会开发的那条道路会不会也是令我空虚的地方。
我现在真的很乱。请你们不要在逼我了。我还是会自习我的课业的。但能不能不要一直盯着我不放，给我我自己的空间。就这段时间好了。
我知道你们都很害怕我过不了这一关，但你们有没有想过，我更可能过不了接下来我将面对的又宽又急的大海？
其实我比谁都担心自己的将来，我比谁都知道我想要的，我比谁都了解我自己的情绪和思绪。我到现在还在压抑着。我想让它在我心中散去就好。
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Tuesday, November 07, 2006
4th November 2006
It's KDF Concert day! However, I couldn't find anybody to attend the concert with me. Most probably they were afraid that I'll lose control on the spot when I see Kunda out. Heehees.
Therefore, I gave 2 of the tickets to my sister's friend and went with Jingting.
Reached there at about 6.15pm and the crowd is extremely big as compared to the autograph session already. I thought I couldn't get a place to stand in it but most people are with super complimentary tickets, which means just a piece of paper, therefore actually those who really paid was like limited? LOLS.
Took pictures but wasn't clear because of the lightings, my shakings and everything.
Zhiyong and NiuNai was the host of the night! They made great partners. Probably because they are quite close friends.
The concert started off with Lucify. Quite a good yawning session I should say. Not really that high.
However, I was quite happy that they sang Di Yi Tian. Lols.
Then I was Soul. I nearly fell asleep. But I still endured through cos I wanna see Energy the real dancing boyband!! HAHAS!
After which, it was Jingting's favourite. Mi Lu Bing!
I think for the whole concert, she was only looking at Sam. Cos she repeatedly asked me the same question. "Where is Sam?" LOLS.
Sam's here!! HAHAHAS.
Finally, it's the foreign celebrities' turn for the concert! Yuan Wei Jue Xing was the first. And it is actually very differentiable between how Singapore's band communicate with the fans and how foreign celebrities' did the same thing.
Yuan Wei Jue Xing at least have some 互动 with the fans like tell us to sing along and like tell us to swing our hands up high. Whereas the Singapore's band, *yawns*, they sing we watch.
Next, was Li Sheng Jie the nice man! LOLS. (Hui's favourite. Her Ah Jie. LOLS!
)
Omg. I'm totally impressed by his live skills. Omg. DAMN NICE. Really touches your heart. And he sang my favourite Shou Fang Kai! HAHAS. Combo.
Then, it was Niu Nai with his Kui Lei and his new slow song. I'm actually quite touched that he actually made the effort to sing all this songs live, although he might not sound that good. But it's great effort and sincerity. Thumbs up!
HOWEVER, his dancing his superb!!!! Omg. Nobody can fight him man. Not even when it starts raining...
HEEHEES. All videos. Cos Energy have special privileges. So no pictures here.
FINALLY. THE MOMENT HAS COME!! ENERGY!
I knew they will be finale. If not who will be right?! LOLS.
I went crazy straight away and left Jingting at the back. LOLS. I've already told her to expect that and she said ok. LOLS.
They sang Xing Ren Lei, Ai Shi Kong, Zui Hao and Ai Qing Feng Xiang Qiu.
And thanks to myself being such a great friend, I accidentally deleted my own favourite Ai Shi Kong's video to accommdate with Hui's favourite, Ah Di's, solo Zui Hao. Tears nearly burst out when I realise that. Stupid me!
KUNDA!! SO CUTEE!!
Then after singing some songs, NiuNai came up the stage with a cake to celebrate Shuwei's birthday! Yes! It's on 4th Nov, which is the same day! So touching.
The concert ended with the 4 Energies standing together singing Duo Ai Wo Yi Tian. Sobs. This is probably their final and super finale performance together already. Hais. Sad..
Sometimes, it just looks so nice with 4 of them.
After that, rushed down to Jurong Point to meet Toh Jingting and the others. Oops. I pang seh-ed them because I wanna see Energy. So pai seh.
And ate McDonald's as dinner? supper? Whatever. Just sinful.
When is Energy coming back??
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Sunday, November 05, 2006
3rd November 2006
Satisfaction.
With the tickets, I went to Chinatown Point straight after Chinese A's examination.
Met up with Hui and I was so freaking disappointed by the crowd. It's like less than 30 people queuing and I reached like 12pm plus when the autograph session was 5.30pm?
So we went to KDF HQ to redeem the posters with the tickets as it was near that area. Hui's friend, Candy, brought us there. It's damn ulu can. LOLS.
Satisfaction plus super satisfaction after being able to redeem the posters. Cos at first we thought that we could not as I got my tickets through contest. But after being able to get it, I'm like over the rainbow already cos I'll be able to see Kunda! Heehees.
Met Vann after that and we went to eat some don't know what mee for lunch because Hui saw Zhang Dong Liang's, Adam Tan's pictures outside so she claims that it must be nice.
The noodles are no doubt quite nice but it's also quite expensive. But nevermind. At least it's not expensive and disgusting, I'm fine with it.
After that we got ourselves desserts too. Lols. Then went back to the queuing place to wait and finally we got the number tags! HAPPY! Another step nearer to seeing Kunda. Was already over the earth by then.
FINALLY. After some waiting they are here. HEEHEES.
What I can say is that I'm dumb and stupid this time again. I'm like stunned again. I saw Kunda and he looked at me twice, but my mind was blank again and I just said "jia you".
WWWHHHAATTT TTTHHHEEE HEEELLLLLL...
Super sad lar. And I like stand there for so long yet I couldn't utter a word more than "jia you". :(
However, it's already super good and great and I'm super satisfied being able to see Kunda. He's still so cute and he cut his hair again. But no matter what, he's still so handsome! Heehees.
Another thing I would like to mention is that Li Sheng Jie is a damn nice man! He's very sincere. He shakes your hand, say a very sincere "thank you" even though he might know that you are not his fan. I'll applaud him for that! =)
The autograph session lasted like less than an hour and the celebrities are going off already. Took some close up pictures of Kunda while he's in the bus. Happy.
He's so cute! HEEHEES. *screams*
However, I think I'm super dumb sometimes. Like when Kunda passes by me when he walk towards the bus, I never shoot out my hands to shake his! REGRETS. Ya. And the talkings. Argh. Why am I so dumb everytime!?
Obsession is still taking place in me. And I'm enjoying it... Heehees.
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